Now, ancient artifacts have been found on Somerida and here in Afka. Similar artifacts were even found on the small continent of Tralia and many other smaller islands around the world. These ancient metal tools and weapons all date back to the year 2000.

   We know, without a doubt, that humans on Erf were still in a low-technology phase of development by analyzing these artifacts through a process called carbon dating.

   Thatís right students, they didn't have Callers or Oil Combustion Engines... heck, they couldn't even figure out electricity back then! We certainly have come a long way.

   Anyhow, the New Vatican Laboratory provides the most accurate carbon dating on Erf.

   With these simple tools and ancient metal-working techniques, the Early Ameridans built clusters of huge, stacked-level dwellings. They were many levels tall and made with molten steel hammered into long beams which were fastened together with metal nails. These structures looked like the jungle-gym in the yard outside. The floors were wood and the walls were usually stretched animal hides or woven vines.

   The man-power needed to accomplish this was provided by the thousands of jewish slaves owned by the Ameridan kings. The jews really have endured so many hardships.

   They would also build giant stone bridges that, curiously, did not cross bodies of water. Instead, they were interwoven through the clusters of stacked-level dwellings. It is understood that these bridges were used for religious purposes. Every single thing in the ancient world had a religious purpose. The priests would walk these elevated paths in ceremonies dedicated to their Mouse god or one of the lesser deities.

   On a side note, the Mouse god is understood to be the highest god in their polytheistic pantheon. Some lesser gods were Kimdashia, Elvicks, Thanxobama, Eyefone, Trump, PokíEmon, and Batman.

   Centers of worship were discovered on the east and west coasts of the Ameridan continent. These 2 areas were dedicated to the Mouse god. We have many carbon-dated artifacts depicting the symbol of the Mouse.

    Ancient observatories in Amerida were also unearthed in the last 50 years. The Ameridan people must have had a sophisticated knowledge of astronomy as these buildings were specifically built to watch the celestial procession. The priests would open the ceiling with ropes and levers at night. They would then squint really hard to track the stars. Clearly, this practice also had to do with their religion. These were a very simple people, after all! They believed that the stars conveyed messages or heavenly instructions from their gods.

   Recently, we found that the Ameridan people would burn "witches" (or virgins, as we know them) to the Mouse. The witches would volunteer to be tied to a large, wooden pole and set on fire. They believed that pleasing the Mouse god with a virgin sacrifice would bring good fortune to the city and make the crops grow.
   
   Also, they would kill unborn children in sacrificial rituals to the lesser deities. Imagine the horror of removing unborn babies from the stomachs of live women! We have known about the primative and dastardly act of baby sacrifice for a long time thanks to the Catholic Guides. The information about the sacrificial burnings, however, came from a recently unearthed book carbon-dated to the year 2000 called The Salem Witch Trials. This would be roughly translated as the Jerusalem Virgin Ceremonies.

   In conclusion, this Early Ameridan culture accomplished amazing feats of architecture with simple tools, they had a sophisticated knowledge of astronomy, agriculture, and metal-working... and they engaged in ritual sacrifice. All of these traits stringently revolved around their polytheistic religion. Makes sense to me!

   The test is tomorrow, class. Please review the information. It's important to know your historical facts.
Back to Coincidence Theory
Historical Understanding Class in the Year 7000
   Ok, today we will be covering the Early Ameridan Civilization. Around the year 2000, this ancient civilization thrived on the continent of Amerida. In the last century, we have discovered more of their settlements. This has really shed some light onto their, previously mysterious, culture.

   The cataclysm that shook the ancient world later that millennia nearly erased all record of our past. Luckily, the Catholic Guides were able to rescue some documents from the Great Vatican Fire which, as you know, happened 75 years after the cataclysm. Thatís why they are in charge of keeping records to this day. Thank God for those guys!
Back to Main
See all comments
typical_comments.jpg
Back to Coincidence Theory
Back to Main
Copyright 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017 by Vornigold
c